I’m using a fake name [No I’m not, I now go by my real name, Cael]. It’s the name I’ve used in secret times of my life. It’s the name I was almost called by my parents. I’m not so naïve as to think that people won’t start to figure out who I am eventually [They did, much more quickly than I anticipated]. When it happens, I’ll deal with it. But this story needs to be told [And so I’m still telling it, as my true self, Cael].
I’m an ex-Jehovah’s Witness. What does that mean? It means that my entire family and social network, developed from birth until I was about nineteen, are shunning me. I’ve not heard my mother’s voice in over ten years.
I’m alone. Well … when you’ve got no one to turn to and shit goes wrong, you’re left in a situation where you’ve got to make some pretty dusty choices. Nothing gets given to you. You’ve got to fight for your place in the world. That, or lay down and die. I’ve never been one for dying.
So here I am. Here, I will write my darkest truth; words written, never spoken.
How did I fall from grace? God, it sounds pretentious, written out like that. It’s not something that happens by accident. Still, the question needs to be asked. How did I, Calum [Cael], go from being a polished Jehovah’s Witness to … to whatever the hell I am now?
I suppose we should start at the beginning. Come with me, back to the life of a Jehovah’s Witness boy. Let’s learn how a child of innocence, became a monster.
This is my story.